Tuesday, August 19, 2008

I Don't Want Them to Fall...

Last night the kids and I watched some gymnastics I had recorded from the Olympics. Ally loved it. She ran around pretending she was a gymnastic girl. I wasn't even allowed to call her Sissy; she was gymnastics girl. I really want to get Ally started in some type of tumbling or gymnastics, purely because she loves it so much.
But I watched the girls on tv and they looked so young. And they really loved what they were doing. But it scares me to imagine a kid being so committed to a single thing at that young age. I don't think that I would ever encourage or possibly even allow my kids to be that involved.
I want to say it's because I think it's what would be best for my kids, but I think a great deal of it is purely selfish. Those girls have so many hopes wrapped up in one day's performance. If they make a mistake, the disappointment in their faces makes me want to cry. I don't know that my heart could handle seeing that type of disappointment in my own children. Maybe in the long run, these girls that go to the Olympics are probablly happy that they had the experience, regardless of the outcome. But that initial pain when they slip off the bars or fall off the balance beam is overwhelming.
My kids are a talented trio and I am so proud of them. Someday they will pursue their dreams and I will be even more proud. And when they are disappointed, I will be there for them to lean on (but inside I think it will hurt me as much as it hurts them). But for now they are still young and I am still allowed to try to protect them from the pain that comes from disappointment. And I will continue to prepare myself for those days when I am not there to make sure they don't fall. At some point, they will fall and I will just have to help them back up. When this happens I will need everyone praying for my strength.

1 comment:

Sandee said...

Hi Nikki!

I agree about the hurt of seeing your kids hurt. Nick was in a spelling bee, two years in a row, representing his class in school. and both times, when he did not win, he was SOOOO heartbroken, I said NEVER AGAIN!

I love your blog!